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Wednesday, June 10, 2020

Too much time alone


I'm starting to get really bummed out about being alone in a new city where I can't meet anyone because meetings and activities are canceled and my old friends can't visit because of the virus. 

I try to stay connected with phone calls, texts, emails and FaceTime, but I'm craving hugs! I want someone to share meals with, to sit next to me when I watch the evening news, to walk with in the morning. I'm sure most of you who live alone are having the same feelings. How do you cope?



My daughter in law posted this photo of her with my son the other day and I burst into tears because I haven't seen them since last fall and they don't think they'll be flying down here to visit me until the coronavirus scare is over. They live in Madison, WI, not exactly a hop, skip and jump away. 



And I miss my daughter, who I haven't seen since Christmas. We had planned to visit in the spring before I moved, but then everything shut down. She lives in Spokane, WA, way too far away.


I'm trying to cope by building routine into my new life. I get out early in the morning for a walk before the heat sets in. Yesterday I took this photo on my walk. It's a Mexican Bird of Paradise in front of smoke from the forest fire. The fire has now burned more than 3,200 acres and is only 10 percent controlled. I'm safe where I am, even though it's so close.


After the walk I have coffee on my front patio and listen to the birds. I bought this mug the other day when I went to my first quilt store since the virus hit. They only allow six customers in at a time.


I'm reading up on my new city. I just got this order of books from Amazon. Hiking, birding, exploring the city and eating.


I'm trying to get into a routine of sewing, but it's been slow. Last week I cut out fabric for this pattern, "Letters From Home," but I haven't started sewing it. I'm not settled enough yet to create an original quilt, so I'm following a pattern.


I bought some cactus fabric ...


... and took this photo of similar blooming cactuses on one of my walks.


I spent a lot of time organizing my treasures just so, but now everything is in place so I'm done with that routine.


This is a collection of molinillos, which are used in Mexico to whip hot chocolate. My daughter sent me the sun hanger, so it reminds me of her. And the Hand of Fatima on the drum from the Middle East is for protection. Every item in the photo below also has special memories.


My mother gave me this "Bloom Where You're Planted" hat many years ago when the kids were little and our family had made our umpteenth military move. I put it in my front hallway to remind me of her and to remind myself to bloom.


I'd love to hear how all of you are getting through these days and weeks and months.

Have a colorful day


7 comments:

  1. Darn, I was hoping things would be opening up more by now, 'cause I figured once you got settled in, you would be wanting to get to know your neighbors and start looking for groups to join for hiking, yoga and stitching. I miss hugging my friends too... have a regular group I would see pretty much every week, and we're keeping in touch with zoom and texting, but the element of touching is still missing. Heck of a way to spend your first months in your new home, but staying safe will mean reunions will be even sweeter when we do get to resume some semblance of normalcy, right? I know... you need a pet! ;-)
    Hang in there... we're one day closer to getting through this, and we're still standing! Hugs...

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  2. Aww Sherrie, I am sorry this time of isolation is driving you crazy. Please remind yourself that it is temporary and you can reconnect with all your loved ones and make new friends - probably pretty soon.

    To answer you question about coping: I was raised to be alone. My family always told me that I don't deserve friends or family. Add that I am strongly introverted and this mandated isolation has been a huge relief for me. But I know I am the exception, not the rule.

    Maybe make plans for when the shelter in place is lifted? Eyes on the light at the end of the tunnel may make the darkness less oppressive. Hang in there. I will get better. It always does, right?

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  3. Sherrie, I know the feeling. Although I'm an introvert like Lorrwill, it is difficult when isolation is so long.

    When I first moved to PT I knew no one, so joined the Unitarian fellowship as a means to form a community for myself. That worked for a time but after 8 years I find my interest flagging so have pulled way back from involvement. That has been made easier by the closing of the fellowship. I'm not interested in online services at all, I can't stay focused.

    I find myself also having difficulty sewing...I did make a quilt from a pattern and it sits waiting to be sandwiched and quilted. But starting something else eludes me.

    Both of my kids drove from Denver last week to visit. They came together, we all decided it was worth the risk just to be able to hug each other. I'm not pondering whether moving so far away was a good idea. Moving back to the Denver area is not very appealing except for the fact that they both live there. I'm beginning to feel as though the move to PT is maybe no longer the right thing for me but can't afford to move elsewhere.

    So as you see I have no answers or suggestions but know that you are not alone in feeling at loose ends. I think you are doing the right things, getting to know the area, doing the FaceTime thing. I Skype text most days with my kids but you're right, it's not the same.

    I think of you and wish so much that we had actually met before you moved. Know that i'm virtually hugging you.

    Susan

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  4. I grew up with four siblings and parents in a tiny house so I spent a lot of time alone outside or playing with my dolls in the cellar- the only place with any room. Therefore, this is not as hard for me to handle but I do get antsy. Before I was busy volunteering and seemed to not make good use of my alone time. I am busy some days and not others. I have a Zoom account and see people that way. It's not the same but it sure helps. I do have a cat who was abandoned as a kitten and very shy. We are bonding. A house without a pet seems too empty for me and cats require less care but he gives me cuddles and laughs. He hardly cuddled at all before but now sits in my lap several times a day for 5-10 minutes and reminds me to be grateful. My kids live on the West Coast and I'm on the East Coast so I only see them 2-3 times a year. Thankfully we talk often but I will miss having my grandchildren with me this summer. You can check to see if there is a Newcomers Club in the area. It is a great way to meet others in your same situation and they often have groups for different activities. I have lived in my town for over 40 years but joined when I first retired while my friends were all working. It was great and I met more people. As for quilting, go with small projects or things for gifts or your house. It isn't time yet to make masterpieces. There are also many online courses to try as well. They help me expand my learning and give me new things to learn as well. I have more than 100 projects I could do, some are started, some are dreams. All in good time. Be careful about going out among others as many do not adhere to health protocols and Arizona is spiking with virus cases. At night when I can't sleep, I count my blessings but think it might be good to make a running list- might turn into a project sometime. You find such beautiful messages to post, maybe those would be good to turn into a project. It is okay to be down, this is a BIG change and you have already made so many changes as well. Sharing your feelings and just witnessing them out loud often helps. Take heart, stay safe.

    Virtual hugs,
    Donna

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  5. Hi Sherrie, i have a few suggestions. First, work on an ongoing project every day if only for a short period of time. I’ve been doing the Sue Spargo 90 day toned-down circle sampler. I don’t always do the circle she presents, but I have found it oddly comforting each night to pick up my stitching. Second, consider getting a pet. Since you like to hike, I would suggest a dog. You would not have to get a puppy. An older dog from a shelter would give you instant companionship and security on your walks and, of course, total, unconditional love. Third, a slightly different suggestion. . . If you have Netflix, check out Longmire. Someone suggested this series to me, and I am sorry to say that I have binge watched all six seasons in just three weeks. Great series!

    Hang in there. Not having close, in person, contact with family and friends is tough on us all. The troubled state of our nation and covid-19 are almost more than any of us can endure, but have hope. Things will get better and you will be able to fully enjoy the new life that you have created for yourself.

    And again, seriously, think about getting a dog. :-()

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  6. I am so sorry that you are going through all of this on top of what you've been through. My heart aches for you. Please be safe. Sending you a big hug.

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  7. I so enjoy following your blog, seeing all your outings, projects, and how you have managed moving to another state and then seeing you getting set up in your gorgeous new house!
    I'm in Aberdeen, WA - and the opposite of your new place, weatherwise, as you well know!
    So - my suggestion for "company" is audio books! I cannot believe how much that spoken word has helped me. If you've delved into the local library system, see what they have for online stuff (Timberland has done a magnificent job of it here, and I've learned how to used the Libby app on my phone for audiobooks - it's terrific!). If you're not yet involved or they don't have much, I'd buy an Audible subscription - worth every penny!!

    I like the dog idea, too - but maybe not immediately possible??

    Keep writing - we love it!

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